simple family

A family of three, Ruth, Walter and Travis. Reading only a few pages in, I had a hunch that the family members really have each other's back. I may seem like Ruth is a very aggressive mother and wife, but it is easily depicted that she wishes for the best for her family.
She may not be the most patient, as she quickly builds up anger trying to get her son up in the morning; she may not be the morning angel, as her husband knows well; and she's defiantly very conservative with her cash, afraid to risk a single penny.  But why must Ruth act this way towards her family? I'm sure she doesn't want to initiate arguments, but she definitely knows that it's hard for the African race to get on the road to riches--they just didn't have equal opportunities. 

On the other hand, the men in the family seem less worried about money. Walter wakes up in the morning to the idea of love. He fantasizes about love in the morning but to have his dreams crash by the reality Ruth enforces upon him--to which he says "a man ought to learn in life not to make love to no colored woman first thing in the morning" (Hansberry 27). Now the little Walter is up and about getting ready for school. Travis is looking to his mom for some money, perhaps to buy something he wants. Travis is quite a humorous young fellow. He argues to his mom that he needs the money for school, which obviously didn't convince mom, but leaving for school to tells his father that mom wont give him 50 cents to buy the groceries. What a guy; just what does he need this money for!
Travis leads me to question if he understands his family status and that his family doesn't really have the leisure to money. I get the feeling that Walter is trying to hide the family's poverty from his son by giving Travis one dollar instead, telling Travis to "take a taxicab to school" (Hansberry 31).

Though the family may not live in wealth, at least they have each other.

a ᴖ◡ᴖ that had the power to luminate a world

A delicate and intricate expressions that show or hide true desire. Smiles are the most deceiving appearance a soul could create. A mask that covers perhaps what makes a person real.

 My favorite line in the entire book must have been after Nick gives his only compliment to Gatsby. "First he nodded politely, and then his face broke into a radiant and understanding smile, as if we'd been in ecstatic cahoots on that fact all the time." Everything about Gatsby imprinting smile shouts out details about Gatsby. Reality has finally "broke" into Gatsby and he knows that it's over for him. He need to close the book to his long and vain dream. This smile was his farewell to his "Old Sport" Nick. He maintains his facade of a Great man even until his last moments of lux-. Although in the novel it seems that Nick doesn't realize the deeper meaning of Gatsby's smile but in Nick's heart, he knows that James Gatz has always been protected by the "Platonic" Jay Gatsby. It had only seemed to Nick that their life had "been ecstatic cahoots" but as a mater of "fact" it really had been fake "all the time." The smile Gatsby used to return a complement will forever hide his floating sadness from the world.

All of this leads to the most beautiful passage in Great Gatsby, his death.
"I drove from the station directly to Gatsby's house and my rushing anxiously up the the front steps was the first thing that alarmed any one...There was a faint, barely perceptible movement of the water as the fresh flow from one end urged its way toward the drain at the other. With little ripples that were hardly the shadows of waves, the laden mattress moved irregularly down the pool. A small gust of wind that scarcely corrugated the surface was enough to disturb its accidental burden. The touch of a cluster of leaves revolved it slowly, tracing, like the leg of a transit, a thin red circle in the water. It was after we started with, Gatsby toward the house that the gardener saw Wilson's body a little way off in the grass, and the holocaust was complete."

This is simply the most beautiful piece in the whole book. The little amount of honest love that could be traced in the entirety of the book is found in the first sentence of this excerpt. The rush and anxiety that Nick endured was the only genuine emotions of love. The other characters in this novel share an extreme amount of love and lust for money and its pleasures. It was a splendid choice in using holocaust to represent the finale of life. After the treacherous tragedy, tranquility ripples the weakened community. Slowly people will move on; the wounds created will heal but to leave a scar to remind that the past is always there.

House of Cards

Just like many of the people in the novel, Jay Gatsby fails to see how delicate his luxurious life is

It seems evident that Gatsby understands the position he's in: a life of lies and impurities. Perhaps a better criticism would be to say his life goal is shrewd. The Great Gatsby had failed to move on with his life and had locked himself up in the mirage of his past. He fails to get pass the fact that Daisy has a life of her own and is managing fine without her long lost love.
Jay Gatsby believed that the key to his perfect life with Daisy was wealth and riches. He obtained all of this wealth to capture the heart of his beloved and to his amazement it worked! Daisy still had the mutual feelings they shared from the past.
With the riches Gatsby has granted himself, he had a chance to lead a splendid life, but his ignorance to understanding his beloved Daisy ruined him. His madness prevented him from understanding that he was no longer in the past; it was impossible for him to return.
His whole being was much like his grand mansion; both were out of place. An extravagant piece of architecture located on the less lavish, West Egg and a strong-willed man trapped in his past stood out so much it was impossible not to be aware of its presence. To the society Gatsby may seem Great, but among analyzing his character and actions, it's impossible not to notice his shrewd motive to steal someone's spouse. Going so far for a woman who has moved on only emphasizes how Gatsby has gone crazy. Although is may seem that Gatsby was "successful," his failure to organize his thoughts and lifestyle created his tragic flaw. His life was made of stacks of cards ready to fall any moment. With a single gust of wind, everything he had would have fallen, vanished.
I can only wonder if Mr. Gatsby's wealth will truly get him the happiness he so dearly longs for.

Memories

My life has been filled with both good and bad things but I'm lucky because I've forget most of the bad things that I've experienced. I really wanted to base this post off of the bad and traumatic things that have happened in my life. I spent two hours trying to think of something "bad" that's happened to me and through those two hours, I could only remember the two cats that I had to say goodbye to. Although at that time I may have been in the dumps, I know that they're happy and living well now. Though I can't say what Jennette Wall's was truly feeling, I'm sure must have shared similar feelings her father left. Sure she must have missed the happy memories her father gave her, but she knows that her father's saved from the horrible lifestyle he had progressed to lead on Earth.
As time progresses people will try to find the better things in an experience; memories will change. Good times will  become the best times, and hopefully the bad times will be forgotten.
Now for the many many good times that I have recalled, my dearest memory was from just a couple of years ago surfaced. Middle school graduation.

I think my middle school graduation was much like Jennette's experience in the hospital after she was "on fire." Even though Jennette wasn't in top notch, her experience in the hospital and with the nurses made the made it an experience worth remembering. Now why is that similar to a middle school graduation ceremony? This ceremony was when we all had to say goodbye to each other and move on with life. We will always rejoice with one another about our joyous memories together, but we each had our separate paths to take. Just a few days ago I was taking to a friend about how nice middle school was. (Lord knows how many stupid things we did), but as for graduation, we all had different happy memories. Writing this blog post I realize that memories aren't everlasting, though the backbone may be the same, the details will never stop changing. The happy thing just keep getting happier, the sad, well still bad.

WHOAREYOUYOUYOUYO

Once there was a girl who saw her own life through the eyes of another being, yet the slightest mistakes she picked out she could not fix. She could not remember when she began to analyze her actions, nor has she ever truly been satisfied with herself. As as young girl she has been continuously challenged by the obstacles in her life that refused to let her lead a "perfect" life, but having a loving family and caring friends, she embraced, like the multiples of other problems she faced, the word "perfectionist." Realizing the public perception stamped onto her granted her insight; she believed that perfectionism wasn't her identity--it was something she must negate if not eliminate. Luckily she realized that her self-identity would be continuously shot down by how others perceive her and that what she identified as her true self couldn't even compare with the stereotype the general public threw her in. It was then, she decided to take advantage of her branded label to criticize the public: when she ignored the bumpy surfaces and occasionally overlooked the simple errors, she was able to feel relief for she was getting closer to leaving the generalization implanted on her. When she was stressed by the stupidity of some person, she was able to feel intelligent, perspective and full of prime caution.

Dandelions

Dandelions.
In The Bluest Eyes, Dandelions are the African Americans in the white society. They are weeds that people saw the need to eradicate for they ruined the soil they grew in and scared away the "beautiful" plants that are supposed to live there.
As a child, I shared memories and beliefs with Pecola. I too didn't think that these little yellow flowers were ugly and dangerous. We "thought they were pretty" (47 Morrison). I remember picking dandelions to make bouquets for my parents, though they quickly threw them away. I remember blowing on dandelions to make my wishes come true, but to find more fluffy flowers the next day. At that time, little did I care or know that these plants were the weeds that people hated and tried to remove so earnestly. Now, just a few year later, I see the horrors of these plants.

Truthfully speaking, I don't think the comparison between Dandelions and African Americans is correct; as a matter of fact, I think it is wrong in every aspect. African Americans are people just like any other race. The things that other races can do, I'm sure Africans can do it as well. If an analogy were to be made with Dandelions, it would be the societal norms that hover above individuals. Generalizations made by people spreed crazily like unwanted weeds. They can never be truly disposed of and are embraced by everyone to some degree--just like how every patch of dirt has potential to give life to a Dandelion. When one child picks it up, they are tainted the yellow pigment. When another child makes a wish upon the seeds of hope, the beliefs planted by society only grows to greater lengths.
So now the question arises, who is scarier? African Americans?

HeyHey It's a New Month, New Start!

Barbie Dolls. They really do impact a person don't they. Barbie dolls are the classic toy for all young girls. They period in which they find themselves longing for theses dolls is the very point in their life where the things the learn and experience will be with them forever. In a way it is almost as if society is mending how girls, eventually the young ladies of the society, think, act, or try to appear as.
What is beauty? Why are barbies "more beautiful"? Don't they say "What's natural is the most beautiful?" So why do people go out of their way so create something so unnatural!

 

Not long ago, after reading Our Barbies Ourselves, a group of friends and I were engrossed in a discussion about barbie dolls at lunch. We search up so many of these people who wanted to look like a doll it not only freaked us out but made us utterly grossed out by people's values. Very famous human Ken said so himself: "As a kid, you play with Ken dolls and kind of assume that is what a handsome guy is supposed to look like." Just my opinions, but that is just mortifying. 

These "dolls were essentially sex toys!" 

Last night I reread Our Barbies Ourselves I felt like I was reading it on a totally different level. I could see where Prager was trying to elude her readers. So I thought to myself, why do people change themselves to start a new life as a SEX TOY!? 

Standing of the same ground as Prager, I wonder if it's alright for young girls to be playing with such toys created by men? Is it alright for children to feel like it it's justified to be stripping Barbie of her clothing and to be playing with her body in that way? 

Our Barbie Ourselves is very controversial, but it brings out why Barbie is a malicious doll, not just by criticizing her appearance but to criticize her even further: to criticize her very existence.

GPA (German Propaganda Art)

Smoke--I guess most people associate smoke as bad and dangerous. That truly is what I believe Art Spiegelman wanted his readers to believe when her illustrated his graphic novel Maus. In all honesty I think that Spiegelman made smoke and the Nazis go hand in hand. In almost every panel, smoke is in a jagged line that is much too similar to the symbol of the Nazis--the Swastika.
  All this smoke represents the stress, the pollution, the deaths, the misfortunes that the Nazis present the world. We can thank the Nazis for coming up with a stupid idea to give the planet earth a thicker ozone layer.


 Next...
This panel on page 23 show an image of art smoking. The look of death roams his face just like those dead from the Holocaust. Just like hows the smoke comes out of chimneys bring the Jews back out into the world, smoke comes out of Art's cigarette bringing his soul out along with it. Smoke kills.








Lastly I would like to bring to light why Vladek might just have been "lucky" enough to survive the horrid Holocaust.

Vladek has been very good about not smoking his whole life. The smoke in this scenario symbolizes the smoke and ashes the come out of the chimney at the camps. Unlike all Vladek's family and friends who smoked, Vladek did not allow the stress of the Nazis to overcome his strong will. He did not smoke, nor did he allow the smoke to get to him. Vladek saved himself buy saving cigarettes; he didn't smoke out his soul, so neither did the chimneys smoke out his body.

KEEP STRAIGHT! DON'T MOVE!

Motion is carefully depicted in both volumes of Maus. The motion on the page literally represents the actions that were taken for each character during the Holocaust, but what not on the page--the choice of where to place stillness--represent the carefully planned out actions that would help a Jew survive through the Holocaust. One must work diligently when ordered to work, but MUST remain      Extremely Still           when organized in rows.

Art displays both motion and still on one page not only to show distress on behave of the victims but also to contracts the different perspective--the bully and the bullied. Focusing on page 108 of volume 1, motion and stillness contrast like black and white. Like foils, having the contrasting counterpart emphasis the power withheld in the other: still only still and movement that much more forceful.

The upper half of the page is very static and motionless because the mice are scared and worried. They remain still and silent as they watch their fellow Jews meet Death. As the reader climbs over the fence to the bottom half of the page they see things through the demon eyes of the Nazis. As the perspective changes abruptly, the movement starts. Through the eyes of the cats readers experience the excessive beating on the Jews. The panel on the left corner of the last row shows the force and the inhumane activities taken place all over Germany. Art shows his audience that everywhere, Jews were in fear of facing these monsters. All of them had only a fence to hide behind and it was only a matter of time before the Nazi came marching in.

The stillness and motion surface two distinct emotions. Art uses pathos to feel extreme worry and sorrow towards the still mice and extreme detest and anger towards the forceful monsters.

What Words Fail to DO.

Do words truly tell the whole story? Would it be easier to write your whole life down in words, or would it be easier just to use pictures?
Maybe people are just bad at describing. Is it just me, but when someone is explaining or describing another thing, I never seem to imagine it correctly. For every book I read, my characters are sure to look different when compared to people peoples imagination, and the characters I see are completely different from those in the movies. I have to say I didn't see the same Atticus Finch, but Gregory Peck did a beautiful job playing the role of Mr. Finch.
Sometime I feel like words don't properly illustrate an image. Let's try an experiment. (I tried with with google too-- very interesting.)
What do you see when I say a ring of different colors? My image looked a little something like this.

 

Maybe you saw something more tangible.

maybe you saw something a bit more abstract.

This is what google showed me:

Everything was different but they all fit the distribution of "a ring of different colors."
Not only do words fail to properly describe, words also leave out the detailed emotions that can be found in an image.

After all pictures are worth a thousand words.

But I do agree greatly with Scott McCloud; without the help of words, a picture will not reach it's greatest value. Pictures have great potential but they need a gentle push to create greatness. Does it ever occur to you that one could wrongly interpret an image? What if the little girl wasn't happy about the boys confession. What if the soldier is getting annoyed with his dog and he just wants some rest before combat. Without the help of a few words, a picture can not prove their worth. Let the era begin where pictures tell and words show.

Add Some Flavor :) Press Play

 

 Airplane-iKON                                                                  My Type-iKON

Perspective: what do you see?

 Are you ever frustrated that you are always required to write essays for classes? Do you ever complain about a teacher for giving you too much homework? I can't argue because I am one of those self-centered people who fail to think about other people. Although it may seem like a lot of work on behalf of the student, can you imagine what it's like for a teacher to grade every single paper that their one hundred some students wrote? David Foster Wallace knocked some sense into me as an audience when he claims that people live in a little box full of themselves and fail to see the world outside of the thin walls. Incorporating the perspectives of other people into his speech he effectively displays how an individual is blind when considering the life of a fellow human being. He starts by showing his audience day in his shoes and how he can't help but feel infuriated by the long checkout line and how "[he couldn't] take [his] fury out on the frantic lady working the register" (Wallace). His day is not sunny with a chance of meatball so he goes about hating "all the huge, stupid, lane-blocking SUV's and Hummers and V-12 pickup trucks burning their wasteful, selfish, forty-gallon tanks of gas" (Wallace).

But when he decides not to let his default-setting take the best of him, he shows his audience that "it's not impossible" to step out of the box and open your eyes to the world around you. It's just like when Atticus Finch says "you never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view—until you climb into his skin and walk around in it” (To Kill a Mockingbird). Everyone preaches this theory because we don't live in alone on this planet, therefore there is no reason to believe that we are the center. Wallace's belief that people are self-centered is not a theory I reject because I'm sure many people feel like they are the center of the universe.
Wallace even says that "[he is] the absolute center of the universe" (Wallace). I'm sure that there are still a hand full of people who actually think that Earth is the center of this vast space, but guess what? We are not. We aren't even the center of our own solar system. There are thousands of solar systems in our galaxy and infinitely many galaxies in the universe. Compared to most of the planets and stars out there, we don't even make up a speck of dust. It's all perspective. How do you see things? Will you take the time and effort of step into a new realm? Will you look beyond the clouds and into the stars? What do you see?

Behind the Stereotype

Stereotypes huh? Honestly it's quite a difficult thing to pin point. In many ways stereotypes are good, then in so many more ways they are terrible. Just a story about a simple and plain Asian girl. What did you see first? Perhaps you saw a short girl with glasses? What about long side braids? How about carrying several heavy books? Maybe even all of them combined??

Just my naive thought, stereotypes must be what people meant when they said not to judge a book by their cover. Just as horrible this stereotype may seems, the simple things behind this stereotype apply to an Asian girls life in so many ways. Is it just me? I seem to always hear comments about being Asian. I'm sure most of these comments are not negative. I mean how can being Asian be so wrong? What's wrong with trying your best in school to live an easier life later? I can't stand it when people tell me that "I'm just naturally smart." I don't hate this phrase because I don't want to be stereotyped, but rather it's just not true (I'm just not naturally smart). Honestly speaking, how could I not like knowing that people don't think I'm an idiot. It's honey to the ear; how could anyone dislike it? What drives me nuts is to see how so few understand that behind the scenes people invest a lot of time and effort to succeed. Sure it's nice for everyone to believe that Asians are born geniuses, I don't mind when people look to me for help. It's just that, every so often I wish that I wasn't Asian. Sometimes I look at the people around me and I realize that I am left further and further behind. My legs won't carry me fast enough to be first in the race and my appearance definitely won't get me anywhere close to
being queen bee. Although I spend three fourths of my day locked up studying, my brain just can't compare with the other people of my race. Sometime I feel like Thomas from Sherman Alexie's movie, how and why should I live to be like every other Asian out there. Will the white people I live around run all over me? Being Asian isn't easy. There aren't any books or classes on how to be the stereotypical smart Asian, there just isn't. How can I live up to who I am portrayed to be!? Why does everyone generalize Asians to be outstandingly intelligent! I'm tired of this lifestyle! I struggle to live up to it! GIVE ME A BREAK! Why can't I just be some pretty blond girl and find a nice man to live my simple life with? Why do I have to be some successful lawyer or a life saving doctor? I don't want that. How far with money get me? Will it find me a supportive husband? Will it give me a loving family? Sometime, not sometimes, every day I look to the heavens above and I send my gratitude to God. I'm so thankful that I have a supportive family. I can always return home knowing that my parents always got my back. I guess having the stereotypical Asian parents are the last thing I need.



Lastly I wish all my fellow Asian buddies good luck in finding what your passion! Having something you enjoy is never a bad thing! I guess an extreme would be like Victor's father, but it's nice to have something you can relate to. If you can't find anything I'm sure k-pop will give you a good laugh when you need it! :)
 

*the part with the blond..intentional hypocrisy to portray what it's like in the real world. One will pity themselves and fail to see other peoples struggles.

What is Time?

 Time is a HUGE part of life and I'm sure many know the stress of not having enough time. Time is always one hand head, and people are constantly chasing after it. In The Things They Carried, time meant a lot of things: uncertainty, confusion, solitude, hopelessness and healing. Below I will explain the meaning of time to the soldiers in Vietnam.

Time is Infinite

 For Tim O'Brien, time is a type of uncertainty. The continuous ticking of passing time results in him questioning the choices he made that lead to his current life. Why was he a coward for going to war? Why didn't he chose a path he felt would do him justice? Why did he have to spend years of his youth in a war he didn't even believe in. This endless time brought uncertainty to many soldiers. They all wonder as to how long the suffering would have last; none of them  knowing when it would all end. Perhaps all of them will die before the war even ends. All the negative thoughts bring depression and great uncertainty. The many questions that the war soldiers ask that can't be answered lead to great chaos and disorder.

Time Warps

 For Norman Bowker, time means confusion and change. The long amounts of time spent in war change all men into someone that they would never imagine to be. An extreme case would be Marry Anne and her growing fondness towards Vietnam. But for those who have a mission to accomplish, it's quite a different story. Norman Bowker, a soldier who was strong minded, eventually changed to be a man who's a "coward." The man of great courage who thought that the medals soldiers earn was a horrible way of representing what a soldier truly experienced gradually turned into a man used these awards as an escape from insanity. For the soldiers lost without an route away from madness, it seems normal for them so be confused as to why insanity is wrong? Why would one try to be sane if they were meant to die in war anyways? The time can confuse a person into believing that they are incorrect is the time that is most destructive. For soldiers like Bowker who spent thousands of hours at war, time is a malicious weapon that could destroy a man unlike any other type of ammunition.

Time Heals

 Upon returning home, it is time that eventually help the soldiers return to a lifestyle outside of war. Though like all injuries, wounds don't heal completely. Time can only heal a man ever so slowly and through Tim O'Brien's perspective, readers can see that the soldiers are trying their best to recover from the horrendous experiences they all faced at war. An example of someone who seems to be recovering steadily would be Jimmy Cross. At a coffee meeting between the lieutenant and the author, conversations about the Vietnam war didn't seem to hard to engage in. It also seem that Lieutenant Cross was gradually finding himself by confessing his love to Martha.

Lost in Time

 When each soldier reflects back on the life they led, sometimes their memory is all jumbled up. There are times where they are unsure as to whether one thing happened before, after or even during the war. More commonly, the chronological order is all mixed up for the events that took place throughout the war. As a troop is constantly traumatized with atrocities from war, it is nearly impossible to organize thoughts in an orderly fashion. As time drags them further and further away from society, soldiers find themselves lost in time and hopelessness.

Time Controls

 Sometimes time consumes people and takes them into a place where they are all alone. Individuals are brought into a hole where they reflect on all sorts of events that have taken place in their life. It is very normal for a person to want a guide to lead them to a better place, perhaps a better lifestyle, a better "me." Time on the other hand is no guide. Time controls the way a person acts: whether the are calm because they have plenty of time, or whether they are rushed to catch up with it. Time is no bright light that illuminates your way our of the dark, maybe a better way to illustrate time would be like black shadow that consumes all the light. Although soldier don't have much time to consider how time had affected their lives, I'm sure each of them left more and more helpless as time passed by.

What is the Truth?

True or False? I always thought I knew the difference between the two, but perhaps I don't anymore. After the an hour of philosophical mining for an answer to define truth and false, I realized that sometimes what is actually be false may at the same time seem so absolutely true. When discussing about the truths in the fictional novel The Things They Carried, I learned that the fictional stories  felt to be so truthful because of the strong and unforgettable emotions behind each individual story. Emotions is the magical potion that deceives the mind in believing that everything is real. Although Tim O'Brien may have never lived through the events in the book, no reader would argue that his emotions were false. Perhaps it is easier to understand if I explained this theory in terms of something that most people find entertaining and astonishing: MAGIC. As people grow in wisdom and knowledge, they realize that magic is just a trick of the eyes and mind. This skill is no magic nor is it in anyway real; it is all FAKE, all just an illusion. Perhaps that is the reason why so many people feel lied to when they experience it. But then why are so many people amazed or surprised when the trick is over; why are the younger audiences so compelled to believe that magic is real. Although magic is fake is it all so real simultaneously.

After all the thinking, I've come to believe that if people believe, then even the fake can become the truth. A lie that is told well could become the truth. What if Tim O'Brien didn't tell his audience that his stories were fake? What if he lied to us and maybe his stories are actually real? How would we know? What is the Truth?